The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen going into Junior Year tomorrow.

I'm really not in the mood to blog but someone was asking for it on my Formspring so I figured I'd do SOMETHING. I'm just feeling so incredibly shitty right now as I have been all day. Ugh.

Summer Conclusion

Overall, I had a great time this summer. I have some of my favorite summer memories ever. Like last year I only had one or two really nice ones, the rest were either a blur or depression. But this year, I can point out specific events that were just amazing. Like the last day of school, or going in Ash's cousin's pool, or the nights we just played video games and chilled, or the Halo nights at John's, or nights in Tawny's pool, or all the parties in general.
However, I also have some really crappy memories. When the jealous ones wouldn't leave us alone, or when I spent afternoons upon afternoons bored and alone watching YouTube videos in my room. Or this past week where things would go from great to bad to great to bad...
It's basically been one hell of a ride. When things were good, they were f*&#ing awesome, and when they were bad I just wanted to throw myself out a window. It happens, I guess. It's just that the times when things WERE bad, they didn't have to be. They were avoidable situations, looking back. But whatever, it happened, I guess I learned from it or something, and there's nothing I can do about it now.

I missed my friends today. My sort-of-old-but-also-kinda-current friends, the Nerd Herd, as we call ourselves. The past 2 years we've spent the Last Day of Summer doing something awesome, be it a picnic or a nice lunch and then a kickball game...it was fun, energizing, and put us all in a great mood for the year ahead. Whereas right now, I spent the day alone, in pain, and bored, because Ash's mom took Ash to Lake Compounce and I wasn't invited. She wouldn't even let him come over after they got home. And it's just like...a shame, really, that since Sal and I broke up and he started dating Rayne, that group kinda fell apart. It's not that we aren't friends or anything, we're still a crew, we just don't have the same out-of-school closeness as before, i don't think. And it's just sad and made me very sad and that combined with not being allowed to see Ash just made me feel very alone today so I cried a lot. So this year instead of being energized and excited to start another year of school with my friends, I just kinda wanna crawl in a hole and go into a coma until next summer. I've been going in and out of this funk for days now and I need to shake myself out of it for good. Whatevs.

Good luck tomorrow, everyone. Summer 2010 will be greatly missed, but hopefully the school year of 2010-2011 will be even better!

P.S. If you find me early tomorrow morning before class (I'll probably be in the commons) you may or may not get a nice first-day treat :).

♪: "Hot N Cold" by Katy Perry
♫: "Firework" by Katy Perry <--waking up to that tomorrow to hopefully put me in a good mood for the day ;).