The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen WHO'S REALLY FREAKIN EXCITED!!!!!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LESS THAN 12 HOURS UNTIL JUNIOR PROM!!!

-Sal has been such a good friend the past week and I'm really looking forward to hanging out with him!
-Getting my hair done! :D. Maybe like this?
-Uncannily conveniently, Sal told me he lives 2 houses down from a cute guy I may be a tad interested in. Instead of pictures I may just happen to take a stroll around the neighborhood in my pretty dress ;).
-Pictures at Chico's!! I'm psyched, he has a beautiful house and a bunch of my friends are going.
-PROMPROMPROMPROM!!!
-Afterwards, I'm not going to some crazy party to get drunk, Sal and I are just gonna spend a chill night watching movies at his house :). Yes, seriously, just watching movies, not "watching movies" :P.

AND UNTIL THEN I'M LISTENING TO PSYCHE UP HAPPY SONGS! WOOOOOO! :D

♪: "Hey, Soul Sister" by Train
♪♪: "Raise Your Glass" by Pink
♪♪♪: "Waka Waka" by Shakira (Shoutout to Naomi :D)
♪♪♪♪: "Born This Way" by Lady Gaga

Songs for the Sitch

"December" by Collective Soul
"One Last Breath" by Creed
"Roll To Me" by Del Amitri
"My Life Would Suck Without You" by Kelly Clarkson

Thanks, dude.

The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who wants to be a good friend!

You all have that friend.

The one who is happy to tell you allllllll about their problems, their issues, their joys, their stories...then thank you for listening and leave.

What the actual fuck, people.

I made friends with this girl recently and she's great. At first I thought it was awesome that she confided so much stuff to me in such a short space of time...until I realized that's all she did. I think maybe once or twice in the past month she asked how things with me were going. She'll literally IM me like, 'I HAVE A STORY FOR YOU!', tell me all about what happened, I'll comment and whatnot, and then it'll go to an awkward silence with me resorting to making conversation by asking more questions about her rather than her asking me, "and how was your day?" Sure, I have stories too, but I don't want to just be that guy who's like, 'WELL, that's great, but guess what happened to ME...' That's just rude. It just sucks that so much has been going on lately that I could have used a good friend for and would have been relieved to talk to her about...but she never asked, and I'd feel whiny for volunteering it. At one point she had been going on this whole long poor-me scenerio about this guy she likes (who's obviously flirting with her back but she denies it) but instead of trying to "be there" and placate her yet again I just stopped her like, "Look, there's a whole bunch of really bad shit going on at home right now and I just heard the garage door opening which is a really bad sign so I need to go." And signed off. (That actually wasn't a lie, either.) But anyway I thought maybe she'd get the message then that other people have problems besides her that maybe she could try to be more sensitive to. But nevertheless the next day she texted me because she was "miserable" because she has little scars on her face. That I've never even noticed. But she was having a panic attack about for being "gross" when she's one of the prettiest people I've ever known. I didn't even know what to say at that point. I mean she's a sweetheart and everything but just like...look around sometimes. There's more to this than you.
So I retreated back inside my shell and have all but given up on getting into any sort of deeper friendship with her. She's almost as bad as Cissa. Ash was friends with  her too, he warned me about this, but I didn't pay attention. Whatever.

Whereas, there are friends like Sal, who make an effort to actually ask me how my day was, or if I had fun at the college fair with him and my other friends, or even Ash does that as well. It's such a nice change. I always make an effort to ask them in return because I know how nice it is to be on the receiving end of it. It's a simple question but it might just give someone a chance to really get something off their chest.

So, my darling readers, I'm asking you: How was your day? Genuinely, I want to know :). Leave a comment, anonymously or not, and I promise I'll read it and reply!

Have a nice night :).

P.S. To anyone else that's been doing college visits as well, talk to me after vacation so we can compare notes! I was at Northeastern this morning, I loooooved it :D. I know a friend of mine who got accepted there (And I think he might be going? Not 100% sure on that) so I'm gonna ask him if he thinks I'd have a shot at getting in :).

♪: "Hello, I Love You" by the Doors
♪♪: "One Last Breath" by Creed

The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who would miss you if you were gone.

I've successfully pushed away most of my friends because I simply can't express feelings anymore. I have no patience for people that I can't trust and I've shut out anyone that I feel like is laughing at me behind my back (like Cissa) or they're insensitive (like Keith or Jack) or anything like that. I'm just so done so I just don't want to deal with people anymore so i removed them from my life. 

Sal, however, is a stubborn little bugger as usual. And I kinda love him for it. 

We were talking last night. Just about stuff in general. First he tried prying a little but just like with everyone else I changed the subject to get them to talk about themselves which 99% of the time anyone will be happy to babble about for ages and forget you have feelings too so it works out lovely. So we had a lovely conversation about things in our lives but he wouldn't let it go that something was bothering me. I was in a fairly good and rational mood by then after talking to him and as hard as it was i decided to, against my better judgement, actually tell him what's been going on the past week or so. Why? I guess because I know Sal is the sole person I know that wouldn't lie to me. Sure sometimes that's harsh but I will always appreciate that. Everyone else has some sort of ulterior motive, some plan of manipulation, some personal goal, that drives them to lie and deceive and betray. But Sal...he just seems to not care about that, so he doesn't need to lie, so he doesn't. And that's really great, I think. 

After I told him everything and i asked what he thought he said that I "scared" him. Sal doesn't scare easy, let me just put that out there now. He isn't big on expressing emotions at all. But he said I really scared him. He said that he's glad I got through that night and I'm slightly better now because he'd really miss me. 

He'd miss me, you guys. 

I actually wanted to burst into tears and run to his house and give him a hug. Because I don't think you can really understand how much those words can mean...I didn't even realize how much I needed to hear that until someone said it to me. Because I always felt like Ash could easily replace me, Cissa could care less, Fred is always busy, Devon doesn't really understand it at all anyway. So to hear I'd actually be missed by someone? That was just like, wow. (And don't take this as it means I have feelings for him, i don't, it's just really nice to have a good friend like that. I'd rather have a kind prom date like Sal than a skanky bimbo. Just saying ;).)

So my advice to you today is as follows. If you care about someone and you think they may be going through a rough time, or even if they aren't, just tell them you appreciate them, and that you'd really miss them if for whatever reason they weren't around. Even tell your parents, you never know if they've been having a rough week too, tell them that it's important they stick around. They may just look at you funny like 'duh', or you may give them a reason to keep pushing through every day. Never ever underestimate the power of a few genuine words.

And never, ever, ever make jokes about suicide. Especially on the Day of Silence. Goodness, people like that are the reason we need a Day of Silence. Ugh xP. 

So yeah. Sorry for the lack of posts. I kept writing ones but I could never finish because I honestly find it so hard to share my feelings anymore. Stuff has been weird lately. :\. Anyway hope you're having a nice Spring Break :). 

♪: "Keep Holding On" by Avril Lavigne

♪♪: "A Better Place, A Better Time" by Streetlight Manifesto

The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who would like to use this post to hopefully make a reader smile.

Happy Birthday, Walter!! :D


Have an awesome day!


(Real posts real soon peeps, I'm workin on it :P)

♪: "Birthday" by The Beatles