The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who learned a lot from having a Sweet 16.

So I'm going to a Sweet 16 at a roller rink tonight (SO FLIPPING EXCITED) and I noticed that having hosted my own 50ish person party back in October, I've learned a lot about how to attend a party:

-If it's a small party, and you were invited because you're a close friend of the person, gifts don't really have to be a big deal. Your presence is your present, generally they'll just be glad to have you there and what you bring doesn't really matter. BUT if it's a larger party that everyone was invited to, or more of a mutual friend (like getting invited to one because Ash was invited so they assumed he'd want me there), your presence isn't really as delightful for them xD. So then your options are to either have a fairly generic gift (which is perfectly acceptable), or a surprisingly thoughtful or nice gift so the person will be grateful they invited you, and invite you again sometime because they like you, not just because you're a someone.

-Write the "from" on EVERYTHING. When people arrived at my party, they came in groups where everyone was just handing me bags and boxes and cards from every direction, there was no way to keep track. I just set them on a table, and the next day opened them all. Now if you don't write thank-you notes anymore (and a surprising amount of people do not...I think Devon may be the only person that's written me a thank-you card in the past 2 years), this doesn't matter as much. But I'm very big on appreciation, so I wanted to make a list of which people gave me what, so that I could write out a personal thank you card thanking them for each gift. And let me just say it is just one big game of CSI to figure out who gave me what when the cards get separated from the gifts. I ended up with a pile of cards and a pile of name-less presents. Some I could determine by handwriting, type of gift, or simply texting a suspect and asking, but it took quite a while and i found myself really grateful for the people who wrote the to and from ON the wrapping or giftbag. So I try to do that now to make it a little easier on the birthday girl or boy too :).

-EAT, DAMMIT! I had SO FREAKING MUCH leftover food at my party. And it was really good too, people just weren't hungry, or ate before they came, or whatever, and we ended up having to throw out a lot of yumminess :(. So again, this goes more for big parties and less for backyard get-togethers with chips and salsa, but it's still a nice compliment when people like and finish the food :D.

-What the birthday girl/boy does or says goes. So no, you may not change the music in the middle of a good song 12 different times. And none of that "awwww, comeee onnnnn, pleeeeaseeee!" shenanigans either :P.

So yeah, I actually shouldn't type anymore cuz I gotta go get myself ready and prettified for the party i will so now knowledgeably attend ;). Ooh speaking of pretty, I did my first actual photoshoot today for Pulp Vintage!! It was loads of fun (even if we froze our asses off outside), and I can't wait to see the pictures!!! I met some really cool people and I hope they ask me to do another shoot sometime :).
Have a lovely long weekend <3

♪: "Birthday" by The Beatles
♪♪: "The Fame" by Lady Gaga
♪♪♪: "Keep Holding On" by Avril Lavigne. {Heal up soon, darling <3. That lung of yours is a bitch but never forget I love you.}

The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who thinks she rocks, because you rock.

I think Nesse might like this post :). Let me explain.

I just got back from my counselor after a really interesting discussion.
We were talking about how I gain my personal worth and value myself based on my ability to make others happy. Like even when I'm unhappy, if I make someone else happy I feel as though I can then be happy because I've done something right. But it leads to a lot of disappointment. Sometimes if I don't think they appreciate my efforts to make them happy, or they don't become as happy as I'd hope, it has the opposite effect. I think there's something I've done wrong, or not done enough of...etc. And this isn't just with Ash, it's with most of the people in my life. So she was saying how I need to value myself just for myself, not based on other people's standards. I need to rely on myself to make myself happy. That isn't to say that I should completely stop doing things like complimenting my friends' outfits, or texting them randomly that I appreciate them and they rock--I just need to stop expecting them to reciprocate. Because even if people do care--and I have no doubt that they do, my friends are great--just not everyone is as outgoing when it comes to expressing that. And i need to understand that and not let it continuously disappoint me when I don't get the reaction I hoped for.

Maybe this is familiar to you, too. If that's the case, here's what my counselor suggested and what sounds like a really good idea.

Firstly, I have to take a step back and not drain myself doing things for other people. I only have to do what i have to, and then call it a day. Now this isn't exactly my personality. I'm an all-or-nothing type, as anyone who knows me is well aware of :P. So, what to do instead? A win-win situation sounds nice :).

She suggested making it a fair game. Anything I do to make other people happy, I need to do to myself, too. So say I'm texting someone just to say hi, and that they're a great friend. I need to tell myself, "Hey! You're a great friend to that person!" Or if I make a bunch of giant personalized gingerbread cookies as Christmas gifts. I should make myself one too, and enjoy it! It sounds kind of stupid but also kind of...really nice. Because then I'm not relying on other people to say, "Wow, this is amazing! What a great job!" Because a lot of times, people just don't. (As Phyllis says, "Sometimes people just suck." xD). It's not that they're bad or anything, it's just not their nature, and that's totally fine. I can accept that and not rely on their approval, because I can just approve of myself! And on the rare occasions someone does appreciate what I do, it's just an added bonus, not something I desperately need to feel validated.

So I'm gonna try this :). It might just help me perk up a little.

Hope the first day back from break wasn't too hard on you guys! Have a nice week :).

♪: "Song For a Friend" by Jason Mraz

The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who's doing really well on her quest!!

Firstly, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! :). I hope my 2011 is outstanding, I hope yours is whatever you want it to be too!

Remember the quest I was gonna go on to become the best girlfriend ever? If you don't, just scroll down a little, you'll find the post. This is just an update on it :). 

So far recently I've been doing my best to become better friends with Ash's friends, I got him what he wanted for Christmas and his birthday (including an awesome Xbox cake I made!!), I help him with anything he needs like finding his wallet etc, and I played through all of Halo 1, 2, ODST, and 3! Plus, in general I'm working on becoming less attention-needy/clingy, and less easily jealous. 

I really hope I'm doing a good enough job so far. And I really hope he's appreciating it. If anyone has any more tips on more things I can do to improve, more comments would be loverly :). 

Ooh, and does anyone have opinions on red lipstain? Either opinions on how it looks or recommendations for brands/shades? I've decided I really like the look of red lipstick on me but it's a pain in the butt cuz it gets everywhere when I eat or drink or kiss Ash, so I wanna get lipstain instead that doesn't smudge. Something red, not too pink-ish (I tried Scarlet Pucker by Covergirl and didn't like it much, too pink) but a little dull, not terribly obnoxious. Something like a Rosso corsa or Venetian red. So if anyone has experience with that I'd appreciate it!

Have a wonderful 2011, you guys <3.