The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen with 20/20 vision.

In hindsight, primarily.

Sometimes I find pictures of myself from 8th or 9th grade, and my initial reaction is, '...ew.' It's even worse if I ever go back and reread blog posts or IM logs from then. I want to just yell at myself for thinking I knew things when I just didn't, and being obnoxiously high-maintenance and demanding and just an annoying, undesirable person. I look back and wonder how anyone even wanted to talk to me, goodness knows I wouldn't have :P.

But then I'll come across a picture of that shrill little gremlin and she's standing next to this really cute guy, and they're both smiling. The same cute guy that happens to be smiling next to me in my junior prom pictures, and the picture from my birthday that pops up on my phone when he calls me. Somehow, that guy fell for the loud brace-faced twerp, and somehow she couldn't quite scare him off. He saw the swan while she was still an ugly little duckling; saw some tiny little fleck of gold in the mud and decided to see if there was more. He claimed he wasn't paitient when it came to waiting, but now I know he lied: he had all the patience in the world. He was patient for 3 years for the frizzy-haired freak to learn to dress nicely, do her hair tidily, get haircuts that suited her, smile metal-free, and become more mature. Well, a little bit more mature. Just go with it ;).

It just baffles me sometimes, is all. It makes me really appreciate the kind of guy that Sal was and is. It's the reason I can relax so much around him--If he liked me when I looked and acted like that, then there isn't anything to worry about if I forget to wear mascara for the day, right? :). And maybe I'll look back in another four years and say the same thing about how I look now, but that still doesn't worry me. Clearly even if I don't have faith in myself sometimes, someone's seen something good at me from the beginning, and I just have to trust that he's onto something.

*: "Teenage Dream" by Katy Perry