The Axiomatic Musings of a Teen who has weird phobias.

For one, I'm terrified of moths. Bad experience when I was a kid. I am completely comfortable around spiders, and bees, and wasps, and snakes, but moths...*shudder.*

I also recently discovered I get panic attacks from being tickled too much, idk if that counts as a fear though or just hating being tickled.

But I came to the realization today that I am completely, horribly, terrified by the idea of break ups.

See, Tawny and John broke up yesterday. Sadface :(. The thing is too that I'm pretty sure they're serious this time. They've 'broken up' in the past for a matter of a day before getting back together, but it seems like this time it's for good. Tawny may already be interested in another guy too, but that's not my business to discuss here. Point is, it got ME thinking about break ups and it just sent this horrid chill down my spine. It was that kind of terror when someone like, suggests going on Downtime when you're afraid of heights, or pushes you in the deep end when you don't know how to swim. Like for one the idea of losing Ash, not being able to hug and kiss him all the time, that hits like a rock in the head. But even just the idea of going through a break up, dealing with all the 'what happened?' and 'aww i'm sorry, you wanna talk about it?', trying to find a way to make things work in your new situation without going insane, trying to stay strong but knowing that's not even an option for at least a week or so...the entire thought of that just makes me want to lock myself in a closet and go, 'LALALALALALA NOT LISTENING ITS NOT HAPPENING LALALALALA'. You know? It's just a huge fear of mine.

I don't want to think about it right now though. Things with Ash are going fantastic. (We worked out what was bothering me in the last post. For now, at least, unless he does it again :P). Our anniversary is in a couple weeks :). I'm hoping to make it fantastic because I won't get to see him on my birthday (he'll be in the hospital with his second lung surgery :( :( :'(. ). But yeah. One Acts is going well at least. And Glee was fantastic last night :).

Oh, and I was talking to my friend Chico at lunch today about how a surprisingly large amount of people read this blog. So like, hai gaiz :). I really do appreciate having readers, its pretty awesome. Be sure to leave comments or use the feedback buttons so I can hear from y'all :).

♪: "Satellite Heart" by Anya Marina
♫: "Your Love Is My Drug" by Cashew? Ketchup? Idk, that drunk dollar sign girl that needs to go to the triple-A meetin's. [+5 awesome points if you got that.]